Unkind Postures of the Boss
(Nigeria) By Odimegwu
Onwumere
Some of our 'Ogas
at the top' behave as if they do not need love from their 'Boys at the bottom'.
They loathe showing kindness to their boys. What they see as the showing of
kindness is the pittance they give to their boys, even when the boys must be
working tirelessly for recognition and upliftment.
The boys exhibit
the most kindness, but are rewarded with a lot of pain. This act demoralises
the boys, showcasing their Ogas as persons, who do not need love and do not
recognise love, when given them. The boys are the ones who take care of the
Ogas’ every need, but are not taken care of in the appropriate manner that
would make them to smile, when no one is around.
Many of the boys
have only been rewarded with tears they shed, when no one is around them. In the
relationship between the Ogas and the boys, the former see it as something that
the boys alone must be giving, without them showing love, forgiveness,
kindness, compassion to the boys, when they need them the most.
The Ogas eschew the
advise that was credited to one Og Mandino, who remarks, “Beginning today,
treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to
them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do it with no
thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.”
Another has it: “For
beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only
words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never
alone.” The life the Ogas live is the continuous keeping of the boys at the
level they were picked; the Ogas prefer feigning a life of completeness and purity, by only
helping those of their friends and cronies, who already have enough; they do
not help the boys, because the boys have not helped them financially.
The Ogas would
prefer to hurt the boys, because of preferences. The Ogas are knack in showing friendship
in words alone to the boys, without their hearts burning with loving-kindness
for all the boys, who crossed their paths, for a change to come their ways. The
Ogas have refused to be lectured to understand that kindness means the quality
of being kind and not, the quality of amassing wealth and owning conglomerate
of cartels and business empires.
To be an Oga does
not mean to have a large crowd of boys, who do your works for you, but to also
be kind, considerate and generous to them, so that they could enjoy the legacy
of having their own boys by tommorrow, whom they would in-turn show kindness, generosity
towards in order to become Ogas. Being an Oga should go with Kindness and
meaningful generosity, not for political or cheap publicity, but also for
virtue to foster humanity.
It was written: “Little
deeds of kindness and little words of love make the earth pleasant like the
heavens above. A part of kindness involves in loving people more than they
deserve. Everyone responds to kindness.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832),
German writer, philosopher and scientist, was it who said, "If you treat
an individual as he is, he will remain how he is. But if you treat him as if he
were what he ought to be and could be, he will become what he ought to be and
could be."
The Ogas are much
interested in making more money and rich friends and not, in becoming really
interested in the affairs of their boys and trying to get them uplifted. The
Ogas are ready to go for the kill if reminded of the prudent saying of a George
Bernard Shaw (1856-1950), Irish playwright and journalist thus: “If you have an
apple and I have an apple and we exchange apples then you and I will still each
have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange
these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas.”
They go for this
kill to remain at the top. And while the Ogas make progress by the efforts of
their boys, whom they hardly take to cognizance are smarter than them, they do
not create positive force field of attraction that repels the anguish of the
boys, so that the boys would one day be like them. They prefer to create a negative work force
against the boys by creating fear, lavishing blame on the boys, instead of
wealth. And they forgot that when the boys are not happy, the work is
internally not given the best.
The attitude of the
Ogas to their boys shows that they are only interested in self, and not group. They are suspicious, always showing unlovely
traits. Even when the boys are on their best behaviours, the Ogas have bad
behaviours echoed all about them. The Ogas want to be understood at all the
time by the boys, but hardly understand the plights and desires of the boys.
From childhood,
Yours Truly has been told that “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is
ever wasted”. As an adult, many kindnesses shown to many persons seemed wasted,
because they misplaced them and took Yours Truly as a fool they have tricked
and dumped. In this aspect, such reward from those shown the kindnesses is what
makes some persons become wicked and begin to reward the world with wickedness evermore.
In their families, they would become the fingered, when the word wicked was
mentioned and are, not ready to be cordial and well-mannered to strangers.
Conversely, it pays
to be kind. This makes persons to be citizens of the world. Let the Ogas learn
to show kindness to their boys for their direction in life. The Ogas should
understand that "a single act of kindness throws out roots in all
directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees". (Amelia Earhart,
Magic City Morning Star, Jun. 1, 2005). They should not be making their boys to
regret that their efforts of kindness are wasted. The Ogas should know that
there is no law in the world that is greater than kindness.
In "Helps to Happiness", Nicias
Ballard Cooksey, says: Kindness is helpful to the happiness of both recipient
and giver. Who does not feel happier on showing kindness to others, and who
does not feel happier on receiving the manifestation of kindness? Deeds of
kindness shown in the little things of life constitute man's chief happiness.
Many are not able to do any great things for others, but all can find abundant
opportunity of showing little deeds of kindness which will add much to the
happiness of mankind.
"The Healing
Power of Kindness" by Jean Maalouf says: More than anything else, kindness
is a way of life. It is a way of living and walking through life. It is a way
of dealing with all that is ourselves, our bodies, our dreams and goals, our
neighbors, our competitors, our enemies, our air, our earth, our animals, our
space, our time, and our very consciousness. Do we treat all creation with
kindness? Isn't all creation holy and divine?
Odimegwu Onwumere, a Poet/Writer, writes from Rivers State.
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